I heart Pride.

I heart being queer.

I heart having a house in the middle of Seattle, and having 6 friends just 'show up' to hang out and drink beer before heading out to kick off Pride weekend.  Good friends.  Amazing people.

I heart having a girlfriend who is proud of me.  Who loves our friends, and our life, and to play with my hair...no matter where we are.  And who makes my heart thump hard every time she even just holds my hand.

I heart new puppies, and old dogs, and kisses from both.

I heart my kids, and the excitement i see in their eyes every day.  Every day.

I heart my life.  I fucking HEART my life right now.  Maybe I'm feeling manic today, because I'm *so* happy.  But I'll take it.  Because it's better than leaving it, right?

The end.

So, I'm around.  FINALLY. 

I lost my password.  I couldn't find the email account this site was linked to.  Xanga support was helpful.  So...I now have access to my journal again! YAY!

Where have I been?  Well, I took a dating hiatus, from the end of January (where, of course I ran from the last girl, because she freaked me out)...I decided I needed to stop hiding, and deal with me.  I worked out almost every day, and lost 40ish pounds.  I found out I like who I am, and did a lot of self healing. 

I had made the decision that I wouldn't date until April 1st.  I turned people down..I was adement i wouldn't date until April. 

I met a lot of great people.  A lot of amazing friends, who I am so lucky to have in my life. 

And come April I started dating.  I kind of went on a two week spree...having two dates in one night, etc.  But one of the girls..I'd had my eye on.  she's beautiful, but I loved her laugh.  And her humor.  So, we started dating...and it got serious pretty fast.  I was that girl..the one who told her I loved her after 2 weeks, because nothing could be more true.  She wears a uniform.  She carries a gun.  She is hot, and tough, and soft.  She is contradiction.  And i fucking love it.

We're now in the middleish of June...and I'm going to be moving in with her.  (yeah, uhaul, blah blah)  We're both so excited.  Just when we think it couldn't get any better, it does.  She's positive.  She's motivated.  She loves me for all my quirks, and thinks they're cute and endearing.  She adores my kids, and is a better parent than I am sometimes.  The kids love her.  They love the house, with the backyard, and the big bedrooms they get to claim.

Life, doesn't suck if you open yourself up to it.

I'm scared of course.  Way scared.  I've made a life here.  I'm independent.  I've lived and worked at this property for 3 years..given the kids the stability, etc. So this is a big step.  But it feels right.  So i'm going to just hold on and jump.

And now I need to go to the gym, then keep going through stuff.  Autmn....want anything?  Couches, tv stand, dinning table?  Let me know...

Love love x a million.

j