December 7, 2007

• I wrote, I wrote!

  Okay, so maybe i've written three poems, since I attended my writing class last week.  This makes me happy, in that way that I feel like the block is breaking, so to speak.

  One of the prompts from class last week, was to write about something you're hiding...or something hidden.  Well..i took it and ran with it.  I will say, it's hard to write poetry in a good format when it's meant to be spoken word, but i'm really happy with how this piece turned out.  I think it will be the first words I read aloud to a group.

   

   

  Is the question;

  What is buried deep in the core of me

  Or

  The cigarettes I hide at the bottom

  Of my bag

   

  Do I tell of the darkness I wallow in

  The unencumbered joy  I feel

  At self deprecation

  -after all, I win

  if I say it first

   

  Or.

  The quiet cries. 

  The,

  Shadow dancing,

  The irrational fear of balloons popping,

  Of being rejected,

  Of not being enough,

  Of

  Wearing white shoes, after labor day!

   

   

  Or.

  I could tell of a time when

  A six year old toe head in

  Cut offs and sunshine tangeled pig tails

  Found the attention of a man

  Could spoil her as fast as the milk

  Pulled from the barn at dawn, leaving

  Her summer sour, tainted, and tasting

  As thick as the metallic guilt at the bottom

  Of the dented tin pail.

  When she realized: try as she might

  She couldn’t tap (in repetitive, compulsive fashion)

  Her dust covered sneakers

  Three times… three

  And find her way home

  Because that field, it

  Wasn’t covered in poppies

  But in rotted hay, secrets

  And land mines.

   

  See, you ask me what I’m hiding, when

  What I do, is hide behind a smile

  A joke, a whisper, a laugh,

  An attentive nod.

  I can look you in the eye-and lie

  And tell you I’m an open book

   

  So you won’t be as afraid as I am

  Of what’s inside of me.

   

   

   

   

   

  So..that's it.  That's the poem i've been playing with.  I'm pretty proud.

  In other news:  I'm taking a dating break.  I have three girls who want to hang out (date) a lot...and i'm not really into any of them.  At all.  Who knew, really.  It just overwhelms the hell out of me.  and I don't really like it.  I'll just hang out at home alone at night, and write.  And find my center..and myself...again.

   

  I hope all is well with everyone!

  xo
  Jen

  • 2:08 am
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